Delightfully Inconsistent

Show of hands if that describes you in any way, form or manner.

*raises hand and waves*

Yup, I thought so. I'm a card carrying member of that merry band, along with Procrastinators Anonymous. I'm also the mother of The Goo, who when she says the magic word, "@*%"x@" transforms into Super Goo, The Nocturnal Terror.

(PS. The Nocturnal Terror is only one of her many aliases)

Anyway, I'm part of this Blog Tour, invited by my good friend and fellow mummy-writer, Sifa Asani Gowon - www.sifushka.blogspot.com . The deal is she mentioned me on her blog (last Monday) and answered some questions, and then (This Monday) I mention her and three other bloggers, and answer some questions.

It's like a chain letter for blogs, men, dude!

(Does it show that I am sleep deprived?)

So first, the questions:

1. What am I working on?
I am working on (putting the finishing touches on) Anthology 2. It's a collection of stories by female Nigerian writers invited by yours truly to give us Nigerian happy endings. Why happy endings? I'm glad you asked - 'cos the world is depressing as it is. I would like to read something that gives me hope, that tells me it's okay to dream a way out of this pit we've dug ourselves into (talking to you, Nigerians!). So yeah. We're basically done, and in a couple of weeks, I'll be sending it to the publisher, and then going to pray :D

2. How does my work differ from others of its genre?
I don't know. Happy endings, I suppose.
(That makes no sense)
I don't know - I haven't really decided on a genre of choice, so I can't say. Feel free to call me Madam Gender-Bender.
(Wait. What?)

3. Why do I write what I do?
Ah!
I like to make people feel. If I can tug at an emotion then I'm happy. Oddly enough, writing happy endings is not exactly easy. (It's not easy, Period!) But it's worth it.

4. How does my writing process work?
That's a funny question.
Hmm. Well, first my internal discipline lever is broken so yeah...but external pressure (I'm ashamed to say) like deadlines are great. That's why the anthologies plan for the year 2014 is so great for me. But my process specifically - I ignore everything else - The Goo, Papa Goo, Meals, Housework and so on - and write. If it's good, yay! If it's not delete, and try again. Later...

So that's me (gosh, I'm entertaining). Next week, you'll hear from:

Kiah, who reads and writes, and likes to eat fried plantain, every day, all day.
www.kiahsscript.com

Pamela Agboga, who writes poems, playlets, short stories and articles.  She recently published her first novel, Weekends are For Loving, and is currently working on a movie script with a friend. She loves reading novels, and watching movies as much as writing, maybe even more, and hopes to beat her writing deadlines this year...so far so good.
www.chowilson.wordpress.com

Xavier Ighorodje, who is a writer of weird fiction, and has not seen it fit to supply his photograph or a bio. So hopefully, this will do (and shame him a little. Muah ha ha!)
www.mrxavierighorodje.wordpress.com

Wowwy Wow Wow!

Just one post this year!

Wow!

I did not know that...I had put up only one post (so far) this year.

How did that happen? Well, I'm glad you asked.

First off, internet woes - here's looking at you Spectranet *wink*

Then, been busy busy busy - edited one anthology.
It's been sent off to a couple of publishers, now we wait with fingers crossed, on bended knees.
Then edited one book for a client.
Now in the middle of editing another anthology.
Details coming very soon (soon and very soon), just waiting for certain people to send in their stories. I won't be calling names or pointing fingers, but they know who they are.

Also been busy with non-work stuff - like being The Goo's Social Director and Stylist and Escort.

Participating in a Married vs. Single Ladies Cooking Competition (a cook-off?) at Church,

and just being generally busy, and tired and living life...like it's golden.

Hee hee.

Anyway, here's a little something something from me to you. Enjoy!

The recently developed off-planet colony of Nirvana was up and running. Marketed by the Relocate Earth Department of the United Nations as the home of the future for all who loved beauty and creation, it had drawn the brightest and the best of Earth's Recreative Movement. Of course, the brightest and the best needed their support system, so Nirvana was also home to maids, drivers, cooks, teachers, and spiritual directors.

Oh and Tech Support. You can't have an off planet colony running like clockwork without Tech Support. Enter T.

"Call me T", she was known to say. She loved Nirvana. She had always been idealistic, believing that Utopia was out there somewhere, so when she heard that the United Nations and a few Mega Corporations had been secretly developing an off planet colony just outside Earth's solar system, she was ecstatic.

"Nothing to get excited about babe", her friend Z, had told her, "I mean daddy says it will take forever before it's finished, and even then it will be an uber-exclusive set of people who will be relocated".

"I'll find a way", T had replied, and she had. Her friendship with Z had been instrumental. You see Z's daddy was a cosmetic surgeon. He straddled the line between recreative and support system. He was definitely getting on The Nirvana List.

"Big Daddy", T said to him, over the phone, "how are you going to get me on that list?"

"Why are you calling? Aren't you coming over?"

"Nah. Z asked me to go clubbing with her, and she'll get suspicious if I blow her off".

"Come home with her then. You can come to my room when she's asleep".

"Yes sir", she said, grinning, and hung up.

That night, he promised to think about it, but T knew he was lying, so she when she snuck back into her friend's room in the wee hours of the morning she put Plan B into play.

"Z, you know you and your dad are getting on the list".

"Probably, but The United Nations isn't as squeaky clean as it used to be. That list is going to be up for grabs to the highest bidder".

T sighed, "I wish I had money like you guys. I would so pay for a place on that list".

"Aaaw. Don't worry. You know you're my girl. I'll talk to daddy. We'll find a way".

Two days later, Z called. "T baby, guess what?"

"What?"

"Your name's getting on the list", Z screamed.

T screamed too, "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you so much. You are the best friend ever".

"You know it. You’ll be on the list as my Backup Buddy".

"Backup Buddy?"

"Don't worry. It's just a new department. It's a not a lot of work, and you get paid Mega Bucks".

Mega Bucks? T was sold, in more ways than she realised.

When they got to Nirvana, Z and her daddy moved to The Estate. T moved to a nameless shanty town. A few days later, Z drove her hovercraft too close to a gas flare. She survived, but lost an arm.

Enter the Backup Buddy.

Two years in, and Z's reckless living had cost T two arms and both legs. Cutting edge technology ensured the perfection of Nirvana a la Z remained unmarred. T was support system. Perfection was not a requirement.

But at least she was in Nirvana.

THE END...so far

Tomorrow (hopefully) - Pictures and Stuff. Have a great day!

Back Story Monday:...then comes Timi with a baby carriage

It's Tuesday, but you got the rest of The Egg Shower yesterday, and I really want to give you some more Back Story on What Happened To Gypsy Black.

So where were we?

Oh yeah, burial, job, no job, wedding, honeymoon, then back to Lagos as Mrs. Someborri (can I hear an uh huh uh huh?). Before the wedding, I had sent in my resume for a financial position in an entertainment company. My degree is actually in Banking and Finance, and I had already successfully written the first diet (level?) of the CIS (Chartered Institute of Stockbrokers) exam. So...new job...in finance (blurgh!)...at least, it was in entertainment.

I was invited for the first interview, and it went well.

By the time I was called for the second interview, I wasn't feeling so great. I was nauseous, I felt bloated, and was generally very cranky. I'm pretty sure I was giving the MD evil looks throughout the interview, and was not at all surprised that I got a "We'll call you". I didn't care. I was kinda hoping they didn't. I just wanted to stay home, turn off all the lights, and lie down in bed forever.

Well, they didn't call back, and I got to stay home, turn off the lights, and lie down on the floor (at that spot the air conditioner never misses) for about 10 weeks. I did get up every other hour to puke, but hey, I got what I wanted, right?

Hmm.

Worst First Trimester Ever.

When that was over, it was pretty much smooth sailing.

Until the last trimester. Where I got tired of being pregnant, and large, and uncomfortable, and being kicked all the time (the girl was a dancer from the womb). To make myself feel better, I took a bottle of Coca Cola every day, and went through a pack of Mars mini bars every week.

Sigh.

And now, I will never be skinny again.

Ever.

*sniff sniff*

Anyway, I got a beautiful bambina out of the deal, so I can't complain. It's a pretty good deal.

What does all this have to do with Gypsy Black? I got pregnant. And to my surprise, was unable to do anything else till I had the baby.

After the baby, not only could I not get much work done, I wasn't getting much sleep either. That pretty much shut the door on any creative process for like a year. Now she's 1 year and 5 months, and is off to school (Playgroup) and Mummy gets to have moments like this to think, and read, and write. Phew!

Will Gypsy Black be back? Oh yes, but there will be changes.